I’m suuuuuUUUuuuUUUper shy omg. I’ve been close with my bff for YEARS and I still struggle with trying to make eye contact or starting a conversation. I’m terrified of making phone calls, I usually have to have someone in the room with me when I see a doctor because I’m too nervous to speak up about anything, and I just never ever try to meet new people. I mean, I’m better than I used to be, I can handle myself in social situations now without wanting to pass out or vomit, but I still avoid them if I can.
But talking with you guys is different. Here, I can double check what I’m saying before I actually say it. In the real world, I have a slight stutter [something I went to speech therapy for as a kid but it still likes to show up and make me fumble over my words a lot], I’m incredibly self-conscious, and I constantly worry about saying the right thing. But on here, I can be relaxed and slightly detached from it all. Because even if you guys know me, know what I look like, and know how to get a hold of me, there’s still a barrier between us that lets me hide my totally lame social ineptitude.
And that’s one of the things I really love about tumblr, because a lot of the people here have similar issues. Crippling social awkwardness, anxieties, phobias, etc etc. This is like a safe middle ground for us where we can still have our full, rich social lives with people we share common interests with, but can protect ourselves from our own short-comings. We know that these are things we need to conquer to proceed as productive members of society which only make us more stressed and anxious, but here on tumblr we can relax for a bit.